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(Taken From My Official Newsletter, Issue 46,
November 2005)
The customer is king in the US and
that’s great, but
there are limits and that’s never more applicable than
when it comes to dealing with doctors and dentists. I’ve
recently been to the doctor and dentist so my opinion has been
reinforced. I suppose since I’m paying for health care,
doctors and dentists feel they are no different from wait staff
or salespeople. They know that if I don’t like what they
do, I’m out of there. Because of this, these healthcare
professionals ask the worst questions.
When I met my first US dentist, he
asked, "What can I
do to improve your smile?"
"Well, you can get Salma Hayek to sit on my lap and have
someone shovel Sacagawea dollar coins into the trunk of my
car," was the first thought that sprang to mind.
The best smile improvement that my
dentist can give me is to tell me that my teeth are in good
shape. The hard sell isn’t
necessary.
I fear a dentist will one day ask, “What
do I have to do put you into these dentures today?”
Things aren’t much better at the doctor’s
office. A couple of months back I received a letter from
a surgeon, asking me to let him know if I needed anything
done.
Visiting my general practitioner is
a little weird, too. Every time I have an appointment, the
nurse pops her head out from behind a doorway and calls my
name. Her first question to me is, "How are you?"
How do you think I am? If I were tiptop,
I wouldn’t even
be here today. I don’t come here for the conversation,
but I always reply, "I’m good, thanks. And you?"
Every time I answer this way, I feel
stupid. Worse still, I fear she's going to call me on my
remark. "Hey, if you
feel so good, then why are you here? Do you like wasting our
time, Mr. Wood?"
On occasion, I’ve answered truthfully. "Yeah, I’m
actually not too good. I think I might have the flu."
Sadly, I feel just as dumb for telling the nurse how sick I
am. I keep thinking, does this person really care and shouldn’t
I be saving this story for the doctor? And when I do meet the
doctor, they ask the same question, "How are you?"
and I still say, "I’m good, thanks."
I remember when a car had hit me and
I was in the ER, the doctor asked, "How are you?" Okay, I had concussion
and I wasn’t at my best, but I still told her I felt great.
There are situations where I don’t need niceties, but
we can be chummy after I’m all mended. At the beginning,
I want my doctor to start in with, "Hey, Simes, you look
like a sack of used turds. What the dilly-o, player?"
I realize everyone needs to present
a professional and service-oriented image, but at the same
time, let’s be realistic. The medical
profession is not a conventional customer/service provider
arrangement. We can get down to the nitty-gritty without the
sales gloss.
That said, how are you?
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